How to stay in control of your separation

It’s common for people to feel like when they decide to separate from their spouse, they will have to fight for a long time and then they are ultimately at the mercy of a judge when it comes time for decisions. This feeling of helplessness is neither pleasant nor necessary in all cases. There are many instances when a couple separates, but are still able to work together to decide the future of their family together through collaborative practice.

Constructive communication

Because traditional court-based legal methods don’t allow spouses to talk directly with each other and discuss possible solutions, conflict can heighten with miscommunication and a feeling that the two “sides” must always oppose each other. Collaboration encourages direct communication and we find that these exchanges keep the clients in the driver’s seat. When someone is able to speak directly to their spouse, resolution can happen quicker and everyone involved feels like they know what is going on, instead of always receiving secondhand information.

Working out finances

Dividing property or assets, and deciding on spousal or child support can happen without a judge or arbitrator when both sides are willing to cooperate and present all of the information needed to make a fair assessment of their family’s financial situation and needs. The collaborative process can include financial professionals who will make sure that you and your spouse have addressed every financial issue you need to and will help you to understood your finances. You’ll have the opportunity to listen to the advice of financial professionals and come to an agreement that you’re content with. 

Making a parenting agreement

Last week, we wrote about how a parenting agreement sets a family up for smoother post-separation parenting, but wanting to have control over the outcome of your children is another huge reason why families choose a collaborative separation. When both parents want what is best for their children and are capable of agreeing upon what that is, the transition for their children can be much easier than a combative and lengthy court process.

Lawyers trained in collaborative law are able to help families come up with the best possible parenting plan, ensuring that they discuss all potential conflicts and decisions that will need to be made in a child’s life. Also, families can receive help from a family professional who works specifically with families going through a separation. They can help with everything from making recommendations for a parenting plan to educating parents on ways to help their family adjust well. With collaborative law, families are always put first.

Members of Collaborative Practice Toronto believe in full disclosure, respect, and open communication. All of these values are extensions of the core idea that clients choosing collaborative law should always have control over their separation. If you would like more information, please visit What is Collaborative Practice?.

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